I’ve been thinking so much about coming home to my body since writing that last post, and have decided I want to get super practical with this one. Sometimes a-ha moments are best incorporated into our lives slowly, even subconsciously, like a feather floating effortlessly down from the sky.
But I’ve found that sometimes my biggest epiphanies need to be given weight and feet. Something to make them tangible and to communicate to my whole self that I’m taking them seriously.
So in the interest of consciously connecting with my body, and the groundedness and integration and trust that makes possible, here is a list of things I plan to do. I’ll write them in the imperative, in case any of you wants to join me in trying them, too.
Rituals for coming home to your body:
- Sit and notice your hands for 10 whole minutes. Notice if they remind you of your mom’s or dad’s. Think back to childhood, remembering activities your hands helped you do, and let your memories move through your life up to the present. Consider how important your hands have always been to you. Consider doing this exercise with your feet, too.
- Write down a list of important things that have happened to your body. Traumas, injuries, surgeries, births, miscarriages, ecstasies. Honor this list in some tangible way: lighting a candle for it; bowing, literally toward it; setting it on a table or shelf or dresser top with a bouquet of flowers to symbolize its honor and importance.
- Pretend your body has languages that speak in the form of tensed muscles, knots, aches/pains, feelings of pleasure. If you could translate these to English (or whatever is your mother tongue), what is your body saying to you right now? What might it have been saying repeatedly for some time? Write these messages down and give them an internal bow of respect. Consider whether you want or need to respond to them in some other way.
- Write down a list of your body parts, starting with your head, and moving down to your feet: hair, eyes, nose, mouth, ears, neck, shoulders, back, chest, stomach, pelvis, legs, feet, etc. Next to each part, write 5 words that you associate with it. These may be adjectives, feelings, or even names of cities, events, or people that have some significance to that part. Ponder the thoughts and feelings each list of words evokes.
- Write a letter to your body. Talk about whatever comes up as you sit to write: grievances, apologies, observations, advice.
I wrote a letter like this yesterday and the lovely soul sisters at 3 Sisters Village have posted it today as part of their summer series, Books, Bodies, Banter. I hope you’ll go read it as inspiration for your own letter writing, and while you’re there, check out the wonderful, trust-nourishing work that Monica, Tammy, and Melissa are doing.
Are there actions you’re taking or have heard about others taking to connect more consciously with your/their bodies? I’d love to hear your ideas!
And if you try any of these things, I’d love to hear about your experience with them. I’ll report back on Facebook as I do #s 1-4, and hope you’ll feel free to share there or hear, too. I truly am interested!
Here’s to your body and to you finding it to be an ever more safe, hospitable home!
Everything Belongs
Seasons are universal. Treat yours uniquely.
I love, love, love your first paragraph…well, the whole thing, but I’m completely enamored with the first paragraph. I find I often get so excited about an “A-Ha” moment that I rush past and miss many other gems that are about to surface with this A-Ha before they can mature by allow that the break through A-Ha can seep into my body and fertilize these other gems and let them grow. What a great tool you’ve offered to allow this naturation of more brillance. Thank you! Lora
Comment by Lora Keddie — June 16, 2011 @ 7:33 amLora, I’m so with you! It takes a certain kind of awareness that I don’t always have to realize: hey! This is good! I need to sit with this one for a while, and really DO something with it.
I’m glad for your company here!
Comment by Kristin — June 16, 2011 @ 7:45 amThis is incredible- especially 3 & 4. As I meditate, I’m starting to really tune into what my body is saying, and it’s incredible what I miss if I’m not *listening*. My challenge is to DO something about the tension, the knots, etc. since sending messages of “relax!” isn’t quite working.
Thank you again for a wonderful post!
Comment by chel — June 16, 2011 @ 8:07 amChel, I’m so glad it’s resonant for you!! And yes, isn’t it so true that “relax!” or “calm down!” aren’t things our bodies respond well to? I tend to think all of us – bodies, minds, or spirits – respond best to kindness best.
Comment by Kristin Noelle — June 16, 2011 @ 10:45 amThanks for this post, Kristin. It’s interesting to me that it came on a day I treated my body to a massage–something I don’t do nearly often enough but always benefit from. And as various parts of my body were being worked on, I took that time to give each part extra attention, and to send them warm thoughts and messages of gratitude for all that they do for me every day–starting with my head, face, then arms, legs, feet, and back, etc. I hope to try some of your rituals too at some point. Thanks again!
Comment by Ellen — June 16, 2011 @ 3:07 pmEllen, that massage, complete with your active participation in it, sounds so wonderful. You’re inspiring me to do the same…
Comment by Kristin Noelle — June 16, 2011 @ 3:16 pmI can feel my body sinking into knowing as I read your prompts. I have spent much of my life either connecting deeply or completely ignoring my body. Sometimes both at the same time in different ways. The last year has brought many shifts, many a-ha’s, many wonderful and painful lessons when it comes to living in this particular body at this particular age. I look forward to seeing where these exercises take me to. Thank you.
Comment by Alana — June 16, 2011 @ 3:58 pmAlana, I’m really fascinated by the idea of connecting deeply with and ignoring one’s body at the same time. It makes sense to me intuitively, but if you feel like sharing more concretely about that, I’d love to hear.
Comment by Kristin Noelle — June 16, 2011 @ 8:18 pmKristin – I have many thoughts on the topic but what came to mind when I commented earlier were the times in my life where I’ve used my body as a vehicle for expression (as a professional dancer and actress) and yet been numb to the emotional pain it carried. I had fine-tuned my control over it, knew which muscles were sore and which carried the memory of my father’s voice, but I would still eat when I wasn’t hungry, would still allow it to be hurt by unkind touch, would still worry about how it looked and and whether anyone would ever love it (me). It is only now, after it has carried and birthed life and death, after the intensity of grief and the power of healing, that I am beginning to love and appreciate its contradictions and complexities, and accept it in its entirety.
Comment by Alana — June 16, 2011 @ 11:00 pmDoes that make sense? I think it’s easy to take the miracle of muscles and blood and skin for granted, to not realize that our memories and emotions are stored in those very cells, to think that exercise and the food pyramid is all we need for health. As someone who has spent a lifetime being hyper-aware of my body, I have been shocked at how much I’ve missed of its experience and how many times I’ve ignored its voice.
Thank you for asking. :)
[...] She didn’t want to be her enemy anymore, or a stranger to herself. She wanted to come home. [...]
Pingback by Tribe love! : 06.17.11 | Roots of She — June 17, 2011 @ 8:03 amAlana, thank you so much for this gift! These insights are *profound*, and have me wondering again, more deeply, about the connection between our bodies and psyches. Something rings so true in your words about our memories and emotions being stored in our very cells. What does this mean for the partnership I wrote about this or last week, between our higher selves and our bodies? They really aren’t two different things completely…they’re so intimately connected.
Health feels so multifaceted right now, as I sit with your words. Exercise and good food and good sleep so much a part of it, but like you say, only parts of the whole.
I have lots more to think about. Thank you, again.
Comment by Kristin — June 17, 2011 @ 8:56 pmThis is beautiful. And very practical, appropriate and powerful.
Comment by Kat — June 17, 2011 @ 9:52 pmThank you.
x
Kat, thanks. I’m so glad it’s useful to you!
Comment by Kristin — June 17, 2011 @ 10:30 pmYour sketch above touched me so deeply. Thank you for your inspiration.
Comment by Alia — June 18, 2011 @ 6:15 amAlia, I’m so glad. xo
Comment by Kristin — June 18, 2011 @ 9:16 am