You are enough

April 21, 2011


My lofty goals of a post today (or yesterday!) about tending trust around goal setting have been buried under more pressing commitments and a few failed attempts at putting words to my thoughts on the subject. Truth be told, my own fears and vulnerabilities on this topic (marketing is the heart of what I want to talk about) are so close in that I think I need a few days’ time to get perspective before coherent words will come.

So let’s end the week here this way:

Starting new things involves a maddening mix of gumption and vulnerability, I can do it! and What in the world was I thinking??? It often takes up more of your energy, more of your time, and more of your emotional capacities than any other thing, and makes the word “balance” (as in living in a balanced way) feel like a foreign, untranslatable concept for a while.

And that’s okay.

It’s more than okay.

It’s how things go.

If you’re in such a season, and feeling the pressure of all you want to do, all you’ve said you’ll do, and all you want to try to learn; if you’re swinging vastly between bold courage and OMG, I want to hide under the covers for a while!; if you’re bone tired from working into the night or sleeping poorly because of all that’s on your mind; if you feel green and new and uncomfortable in the knowledge that learning to walk – or run or fly, for that matter – inevitably involves trips and stumbles and flat out face plants; if you wish you could crawl up into someone’s lap and be small and safe and held there for a while:

The image above is for you.

I’m sending love and a wish for peace for us all,

 

 

 

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11 comments   |   Filed in: Meditations   |   Tags: ,   |  

11 Comments »

  1. If I had a dollar for every time I’ve wanted to hide under the covers for a while! Such an authentic post Kristin. Thank you. I love the image. And look forward to talking sometime soon, when there isn’t quite so much burying you.

    Comment by Tink — April 21, 2011 @ 10:34 pm
  2. Oh my goodness, Tink! I’m off to write you an email…

    Comment by Kristin — April 21, 2011 @ 10:43 pm
  3. This post – this image – speaks straight into the heart of all that is unresolved and anxious about me – all that I want. This is what my “word of the year” trust is about … just believing that it’s all OK as it is. That I am OK as I am. But then my brain starts spinning … doesn’t that mean I’m “letting myself off” easy, and how will I effect change without some kind of pressure? Oh, but I want to just rest and trust.
    Welcome to the gerbil run of my mind. I’m sorry to babble!
    xoxo

    Comment by Lindsey — April 22, 2011 @ 3:30 am
  4. I have been returning to that message often lately: I am enough.

    I don’t have to do certain things or show up in certain places or say certain things in order to be enough. I am enough right here and right now. And I am enough whether or not I ever ship off any of my ideas or dreams. Sure, I will try. Sure, I will succeed in some and do face plants in others.

    But none of my future efforts change my present truth: I am enough.
    Thank you for that reminder – and for the writings on comparisons as well.

    Comment by GailNHB — April 22, 2011 @ 5:17 am
  5. Lindsey, I’m sending so much love your way! I so relate to the frantic feeling of not-enoughness!

    In my life, though, the biggest and longest-lasting transformations have happened when I’ve experience safety and love. Truly, those things have been magic, and whenever I find myself on the gerbil run you describe, I try to remember those experiences and what’s been made possible because of them. Pressure, from inside and out, does help us get things done, but I guess I want to give voice to the other side here as well – that utter LACK of pressure, in the context of love, gets wonderful, life-changing, world-transforming things done, too.

    I so wish this kind of pressure-less space for you!

    Gail, for the very reasons I wrote to Lindsey here, I think what you’ve described is world-changing! It’s SO EASY to read the writings of hugely productive people – and *especially* writings that talk about the importance of DOING – and have feelings of not-enoughness triggered. I’m grateful for the work people do to transform complacency in our world, but I think right alongside of them need to be voices and embodied lives of people living out our inherent worth and the beauty of non-judgment and the transformations that are possible completely off the grid of DOING and PRODUCING.

    I feel so strongly about this!!! The grid of doing and producing is not the only grid worth judging ourselves by.

    Thanks for being a companion in this work, Gail. Much love to you.

    Comment by Kristin — April 22, 2011 @ 6:46 am
  6. WOW what a message. I think God leads people to say things he knows others need to hear. I am in the burying, hiding mode right now and keep telling myself it is ok to just be. Just being sometimes is where the start of new things happen and I have to push aside the thoughts that I am not productive. Great message.. Have a blessed easter.

    Comment by Shandeen — April 22, 2011 @ 6:55 am
  7. Shandeen, it was the weirdest thing last night: I tried and tried again to get that post about marketing written, and kept feeling the strongest nudge to just write something gentle, that all of us need to hear. I’m glad it came when you needed it.

    Comment by Kristin — April 22, 2011 @ 8:17 am
  8. I needed to hear this too – thank you, Kristin. I am in a raw and vulnerable place right now, and I definitely want to hide – thanks for this gentle message.

    Comment by Katie — April 22, 2011 @ 8:23 am
  9. Katie, here’s to hiding when we need to! Sending love and gentleness your way.

    Comment by Kristin — April 22, 2011 @ 4:45 pm
  10. Kristin–I love this image and saying. I often feel I have to try to make myself better. It’s rare that I feel just fine where I am, which of course is unsettling and not very peaceful. So, thanks for this inspiring message and reminder!

    Comment by Jill — April 24, 2011 @ 2:28 am
  11. Jill, you’re so welcome. I need the reminder so much, too!

    Comment by Kristin Noelle — April 24, 2011 @ 3:46 pm

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