April 1, 2011

A new season is upon us and, at least for those in the northern hemisphere, it’s one of so much newness: leaves, buds, flowers, green.

Content at Trust Tending this month will be a line of harmony with what’s happening in the natural world. The focus here will be tending trust around starting new things.

Whether you’ve recently embarked on some new endeavor, are gearing up to do so, or have only glimmers of longing toward such a thing, you probably aren’t a stranger to the fears that accompany beginnings. This month will be devoted to tending trust around fears and beliefs such as:

• Failure is shameful and must be avoided at all costs.
• People in my position or age bracket shouldn’t feel as vulnerable as I do.
• I’m exhausted after doing nerve-racking things. Something is wrong with me.
• I feel so out of it. How in the world will I learn what I need to learn to do this well…or even know what it is I need to learn?
• How can I possibly earn enough money to make this work?
• If I succeed, I’ll alienate people I love.
• If I talk to my family about this, they won’t “get it” and I’ll feel stupid. If I keep pursuing it anyway, they’ll feel confused and maybe disrespected.
• I don’t know anyone else doing this kind of thing. Maybe I shouldn’t do it.
• My partner’s career matters way more than me pursuing this dream.
• I’m shamefully less clever/experienced/connected/creative/brilliant/etc. than _______. Maybe I should throw the towel in now.
• Success is defined by money earned, popularity garnered, and sphere of influence secured.
• Having fans will fulfill my deepest needs for love.
• Being a beginner is reason for shame.
• Blooming early is what counts.
• If I haven’t reached x level of success (mastery, income, connectedness) within weeks (or months or years) of starting, I will have failed.
• I have so much less time than other people for this. I feel sorry for myself.
• Superstars are the benchmark I use to judge my worth.
• Looking stupid is the worst thing in the world.
• All or nothing, baby. Period.

If any of these sound like thoughts from your head, I hope you stick around! I have a feeling this is going to be a wonderful month for the growth of our trust – yours and mine!

Each month at Trust Tending is devoted to a different theme. Click here to view and peruse past themes and to see a working list of themes to come.

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14 Comments »

1. Hi Kristin
   This month’s theme is very much a trust building exercise for me. The above message is right on time for me as I embark on a massive project and most of those shackles (just about) are playing a part in my mind. It is high time that I trust in my Higher Self’s capacities and capabilities and unshackle myself from self limiting doubts and fears. Your sketches on Trust are perfect and timely for me and I eagerly look forward to that email every morning.

   Keep up the good work.

   Blessings
   Padma Ayyagari
   Australia

   Comment by Padma — April 1, 2011 @ 10:09 pm

2. Padma, the energy in your voice is wonderfully palpable! I’m excited for your project and for what looks to be the inevitable loosening and falling away of your shackles!

   Thanks so much for your blessings!

   Comment by Kristin — April 1, 2011 @ 10:30 pm

3. Kristin…have you been inside my head lately and I didn’t know it?? While not all of those ‘shackles’ pertain to me, enough do that I think you’ve been reading my mind!! I am in the process of living a dream and taking it even further. You’d think I’d be over those fears especially at my age. But, they’re still back there in my head niggling my brain and making each step feel heavy. I can hardly wait to read what you have to share. I need to break totally free and enjoy this adventure!
   Evelyn
   Deep in la France profonde!

   Comment by Evelyn — April 2, 2011 @ 12:26 am

4. Evelyn, not inside your mind, but inside mine! I hope it’s no secret that TONS of what I do here is tending trust around my own fears. I can’t say how happy I am to be in such good company, and to know that I’m far from the only one who deals with thoughts and beliefs like these.

   I lift my glass with you to breaking free and enjoying the adventure!!

   Comment by Kristin — April 2, 2011 @ 1:00 am

5. My Lent lily bush has started her own new things of birthing eight new flowers in the last week. I love these flowers. They shout new life to me each year – transfiguring as they do the dark earth in which they grow. The equally life-giving wind which blows at us up from the North Sea broke one stem last night and I was devastated. However, some desire for new life within me inspired me to bring them inside, take the flower heads and float them in a bowl of water on our den table. Now, rather than only seeing them when I look outside,they greet me every time I pass them, many times in the day. It is as if they will find a way to do what they do any which way they can, not just within the confines of normal expectations. Could it be that nature’s way of doing new things can teach us something about persistence and adaptability in our endeavours for new things?

   Your site is really thoughtful and inspirational!

   Tessa
   in the teeth of a Scottish gale!

   Comment by Tessa — April 2, 2011 @ 1:48 am

6. Tessa, your story is wonderful! Yes! Finding a way to do what we do, not just within the confines of expectations. Here’s to Sage Nature!

   And as an aside, how very fun to have company around the globe!! So glad to hear where you all are from!

   Comment by Kristin — April 2, 2011 @ 3:34 am

7. I am in my 60′s and trying to learn nature photography. Wow! All of those thoughts/feelings you listed apply to me! I keep wondering why in the world I’m trying to do this anyway, despite wonderful affirmations from people I respect insisting there doesn’t have to be any reason other than pure enjoyment of God’s creation and beauty and wonder. Here’s a quote I came across a few weeks ago that has somehow stuck with me and keeps me going: “Use the talents you possess — for the woods would be a very silent place if no birds sang except for the best.”

   Comment by BJ — April 2, 2011 @ 8:14 am

8. BJ, that quote got me all teared up. Perfectly perfect. Thank you for sharing it.

   Comment by Kristin — April 2, 2011 @ 8:35 am

9. I’m here and I’m excited for all you’ll discuss here this month as I work on my own brand new project!

   Comment by Christine @ Coffees & Commutes — April 2, 2011 @ 10:56 am

10. Christine, so glad you’re here!!! Looking forward to the day I get to read your book!!

    Comment by Kristin — April 2, 2011 @ 11:01 am

11. Hi Kristin,

    Great illustration – exactly where I am lately…

    I am finishing up a Year of Living Mindfully program, and start Martha Beck’s coaching course in a week! Trying to say no to more in order to focus on a few key things…

    I’m looking forward to following your thoughts, as always…

    XOXO

    C

    Comment by Christa — April 2, 2011 @ 11:05 am

12. Christa, your life sounds so very rich! Both courses/programs you list sound wonderful.

    Glad for your company here!

    Comment by Kristin — April 2, 2011 @ 11:22 am

13. Kristin,

    Wow–I have felt a lot of these things–like throwing in the towel and worrying about looking stupid (this was huge for me in high school). I’m getting better at not worrying as much of how I appear to others as I used to–it was crippling in high school. I can’t wait to read what you have in store for April!

    Comment by Jill — April 2, 2011 @ 6:56 pm

14. Jill, yes, high school is such a seed bed of self consciousness. I’m glad to hear you’re feeling far less crippled by it than then. I have to say that as so many in our culture are chafing at growing older, I’m LOVING the effects of age on my inner life – what you’ve described here is definitely one of them. :)

    Comment by Kristin — April 3, 2011 @ 12:27 pm

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